August 19, 2016

This Crazy English

We’ll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes,
But the plural of ox is oxen, not oxes;
One fowl is a goose, while two are called geese,
Yet the plural of mouse is  never called meese!
You may find a single mouse or a whole set of mice,
But mind you, the plural of house is houses, not hice.
If the plural of man is always called men,
Then why shouldn’t the plural of pan be called pen?
If I speak of a foot and you show me your feet,
And I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?
If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
Why should not the plural of booth be called beeth?
Then, one may be that, and three may be those,
But hat in the plural would never be hose;
And the plural of cat is cats, not cose.
We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
But though we say mother,  we never say methren,
Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
But imagine the feminine—she, shis  and shin,
So English, I am sure you all will agree,
Is the funniest language you never did see.
(The stanzas are sent by our elder sister
Ma Than Htay.- Ed)


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